Supporting Orphans – An Ode to Military Humor

When I served as the commander of the 305^th Supply and Services Company in the 227^th Maintenance Battalion At Yongsan, Seoul, Korea, I had a large contingent of KATUSA (Korean Augmentation to the United States Army) soldiers.  The KATUSA soldiers in U.S. Army units increased the combined Republic of Korea/United States defense capability on the Korean peninsula, but they also provided the U.S. Army military manpower and significant monetary savings.  An added benefit was that they helped to reduce or eliminate communications barriers.  The KATUSA’s in my unit were well aware of the fact that I was married to a Korean.  Apparently, that meant something to them.  Their usefulness and benefit to the unit had not always been appreciated.  In fact, I was told that the previous commander had no use for them.  Thus, they were quite surprised the first time that they met my wife and she actually stopped and spoke with them.  One day as I was walking through the company area, a few senior KATUSA’s in my unit approached me and asked to speak with me.  I replied, “What’s on your mind fellas?”  “Sir, would you be willing to meet the KATUSA Sergeant Major?”  “Why is something going on?”  “For many years, the 305^th Supply and Services Company has supported Hi Mang Orphanage.”  “Is that true?”  “Yes Sir.  Lieutenant Wilson can tell you more about it.  The last commander didn’t support the orphanage so much, so I think the Sergeant Major would like to talk with you.”  “Sure.  Check with the clerks in the orderly room to set something up on my calendar and we can have a meeting.”  After the KATUSA’s saluted and walked off, I decided to stroll over to the Self-Service Supply Center (SSSC) to chat with Lieutenant Wilson.  Lieutenant Julie Wilson had been in the 305^th Supply and Services Company almost 2 years, and she had been in charge of the orphanage support previously.  She confirmed what I already suspected, which was that the company did nothing to support the orphanage the previous year under the former commander.  I asked her to give me examples of some of the typical things that the company used to do.  She took it a step further.  She showed me her project planning binder complete with event planning, funding requests, Matériel support, and pictures.  She asked me if we were going to start supporting the orphanage again?  I asked, “Again?”  You mean, we stopped?”  She replied, “Yes Sir.  The previous commander wouldn’t let us do anything to support the orphanage.”  “What?”  “Yes Sir.  He told us it was a waste of time and money and resources.”  “Well, I’m meeting with the KATUSA Sergeant Major sometime this week.  I’m pretty sure the meeting is going to be about KATUSA support programs in general and orphanage support, specifically.  Support for the orphanage is back on.  I want you to arrange a trip for me and a couple of the senior KATUSA’s, yourself, and the First Sergeant to pay a visit to the orphanage.  I just want to get a feel for the place to see what they need and what we can do for them.  Can you set that up?”  “Yes Sir.”  “Good.  Take care of it and report back to me.”  As luck would have it, the KATUSA Sergeant Major couldn’t meet with me until the following week.  Meanwhile, Lieutenant Wilson had scheduled a trip to Hi Mang Orphanage for a couple of the senior KATUSA’s, the First Sergeant, herself, and me the coming weekend.  When we arrived at the orphanage, the administrator was waiting to greet us.  I asked if we could tour the facilities first then meet the children and find out their needs.  As we toured the facilities, I conferred with my First Sergeant about potential facilities upgrades that we could perform by simply visiting the Property Disposal Office (PDO) at Yongsan.  For example, we could check out PDO for things like unused paint that units had turned in as excess to needs.  Additionally, we could check for things like used throw rugs and carpet remnants from barracks remodels.  The rugs and carpet remnants would really help in the living areas where the children stayed.  I would have to check with the Battalion Commander, but we could probably get a small grant from the Morale, Welfare and Recreation (MWR) fund to purchase painting supplies such as brushes, rollers, and paint pans as well as perhaps a soccer ball and a couple other small recreational toys for the children to play with.  After we finished our tour of the facilities, we asked the administrator if it would be okay to paint the inside of the orphanage.  That really made him happy.  He was excited to hear about anything that we could do to improve the quality of life for the children.  Then, I told him we would like to meet the children.  After we met with the children, I asked Lieutenant Wilson to ensure that we set up some sort of method to include meals during our next visit.  We told the administrator that we would not be able to schedule our next visit for at least two weeks due to other commitments but that we would return as promised to perform some facilities upgrades.  On the trip back to Yongsan, I was already doing a lot of advance planning.  I would have to visit the PDO to determine exactly what kind of support we could expect from them.  I asked Lieutenant Wilson to take care of the SSSC supplies such as paintbrushes and rollers.  I also asked her to take care of looking into the MWR grant.  I asked the First Sergeant to coordinate troop support for the follow-on visit.  I wanted the soldiers to understand that the trip to the orphanage would be totally voluntary.  We would not force anybody to go that did not want to go.  However, anybody that did volunteer to go would get a three day pass signed by me.  I also asked the First Sergeant to see what the mess hall could do in terms of meal support for two meals for the kids at the orphanage.  I said it would be helpful if we had a cook to come along and serve the meals.  However, that would be totally optional.  When I had given everybody their tasks, I sat back and smiled.  The First Sergeant looked over and asked, “Sir, why are you smiling?”  I simply replied, “I love it when a plan comes together.”  The following week, I paid a visit to PDO and found everything we needed.  I even found something I thought would work great for the mess hall.  But that is another story.  I met with the KATUSA Sergeant Major, and just as I suspected, he had wanted to speak with me about support for the KATUSA’s in the unit and support to the orphanage.  I briefed him on everything we had already done concerning the orphanage and what we were about to do.  And I assured him that his KATUSA’s would be treated as part of the 305^th Supply and Services Company family.  I asked him to have informal chats with some of his KATUSA’s to see how things stood.  Actually, I was kind of surprised that he hadn’t already done that.  But I understood.  He was busy.  So was I.  Get over it.  We shook hands and that was that.  I didn’t encounter any exercises in futility while I set up my initial orphanage support.

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