After I took command of the 305th Supply and Services Company, several significant things happened in just a few short weeks. First, my First Sergeant was replaced. I think all of the soldiers breathed a collective sigh of relief the day that he left. It was like a 1000 pound weight that had been hanging over the company had finally been removed. But even more significant than that was the day that the Battalion Commander called me into his office for an important briefing. Congressman Sonny Montgomery was leading a high level delegation of dignitaries and military officers who were repatriating the first ever US war remains from the Korean War on May 27, 1990. That was just a few short weeks after I had taken command. All of my soldiers and I were required to be in our dress greens with bloused boots and white dress gloves as we escorted the remains. We looked like we were participating in a regular Disney pageant. We had to borrow white dress gloves from the MP (military police) brigade and from the eighth Army band because they were the only units that we knew that had white dress gloves. I mean seriously, who in the hell wears white dress gloves? Okay. Okay. The Korean car mechanics wore these kinda white cotton gloves. But they always had some sort of stripes on them. The stripes were either red or blue or green, and they were usually located on the back of the hand. Those white gloves weren’t fancy dress gloves. Oh hell no. Like I said, they were cheap cotton gloves. The Korean mechanics and other laborers such as plumbers would wear those gloves to keep their hands clean. But I thought it was a pretty good idea, so I started wearing those cheap cotton gloves whenever I worked on my own car. Those gloves really saved me the hassle of scrubbing my hands and having dirt underneath my fingernails. I know what you’re thinking. Having dirt and grease underneath your fingernails is nasty and unsanitary. Yeah. Sure. I’ve heard all that before. But if you are going to work on cars, it’s a hazard of the trade. But some people just can’t get around the fact that they just got to look down their nose at your poor grimy fingernails while they make their little snide comments about your unsanitary condition. You know. Comments like, “You are going to catch your death from those unsanitary, nasty ass fingernails. Why don’t you clean that shit?” And God forbid that you should try to eat food with your grimy ass hands and your nasty ass fingernails. Oh my God! You’d think that the planet was going to stop and throw you off or something. Of course, none of that shit ever happened. You just went about your business and ate your food with your grimy ass hands and your nasty ass fingernails and life went on. Case in point, I’m still here. But as I got older and maybe a little wiser, I thought perhaps those Koreans had a pretty good idea. So, I copied their idea. It worked out pretty well. But as for wearing those fancy-schmancy white dress gloves like Michael Jackson did when he did the moonwalk, well, I never really considered it before. But then, the Army and my Battalion Commander helped me to decide that it would be a pretty good idea to do it. Once Congressman Montgomery and his contingent of dignitaries repatriated the US war remains from the North Koreans at Panmunjom, we escorted those remains down to Yongsan so that they could lay in state at my mortuary. While those Korean War remains laid in state at my mortuary, my soldiers had to stand guard around the clock. We performed guard duty around the mortuary while the Eighth Army honor guard performed the actual guard duty for the remains. We did that throughout the Memorial Day weekend. The following week, we escorted those remains to the airport so that they could be flown to Hawaii to begin the identification process. I never expected to be involved in an actual repatriation of US soldier Korean War remains. It was truly a highlight of my command, even if we had to wear the fancy white dress gloves. No. We didn’t do a moonwalk and we didn’t perform any pageant, but our ceremony was pretty somber, nonetheless. We treated those repatriated remains with all due respect, and we performed with no exercises in futility.
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